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Always Take a Goat to the Party

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Me taking a goat to the party
So how do you make friends with the Obama family and ensure access to all the key players in Kenya as their relative vies to become the most powerful man in the world? The answer, of course, is always, always take a goat to the party. I found John for sale at the side of the road. My driver said he was just what I wanted: Big bellied and large-testicled meant he would make excellent nyama choma (roasted meat). And for 2500 shillings he was something of a bargain. It goes without saying that Abongo Malik Obama, Obama's elder half-brother, was delighted. And I've got a rather nice feature.
There's only one thing to take to a Kenyan election victory feast: a goat. Preferably still breathing - “a sign of freshness“ - and with big testicles, apparently the sign of quality breeding. And so it was that I found myself bouncing along a dirt track towards the ancestral home of the Obamas in a saloon car with the sound of John the goat bleating miserably from the boot.


Vasco Pyjama | November 5, 2008 5:13 AM | Reply

In Australia, we say BYOG -- bring your own grog. This is a totally different G altogether.

You're a nut. Hope you enjoyed your mbuzi.

nuttycow | November 5, 2008 9:51 AM | Reply

Couldn't you think of a more inspired name? John?!

Gareth is much nicer.

Tamar | November 5, 2008 10:32 AM | Reply

nice looking animal, pity you can't just have ugali...

MartinG | November 5, 2008 4:20 PM | Reply

Sinister horns, swollen belly and an impressive pair of testicles,

and the goat's a fine specimen too... !

Well done again mate!

Anonymous | November 5, 2008 4:23 PM | Reply

Hee hee, was waiting for that gag Mr G. Thanks for obliging.

Anonymous | November 6, 2008 10:04 AM | Reply

Tasty Rob, very tasty. How do Kenyan goat bollocks taste? The Vietnamese like to grill goatess tits, make goat bollock whisky and drink the blood. Wonder if Kenyans do the full goat too?

BTW - thanks for such great blogging this week :)

Anonymous | November 6, 2008 1:06 PM | Reply

Er thanks. Goat liver is one of the finest foods known to man. Fried with a little green pepper, onion and maybe some chilli. The Vietnamese options sound dire

Anonymous | November 6, 2008 4:17 PM | Reply

Goat liver Kenyan Crilly style would make a fine post sir... The Vietnamese options are less dire than they sound on paper, but they are "challenging" foods.

Anonymous | November 7, 2008 8:09 AM | Reply

John bought it last night. I'm told he was very tasty and a "fine specimen".

What do you think?